Waiting
by josephina
Summary: Pam and Jim finally take a step in the right direction.


Hey guys, if parts of this story look familiar, its because I sort of meshed parts of a drabble I wrote with this new story. I decided the other day that the drabble, "Dreams," was too short and vague, so I decided to write a longer story and just use my favorite parts of it. Anyway, I hope you enjoy!

Until next time,

Josephina

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"I can't believe we're doing this," Jim murmured against my ear. His voice sent a tingle down my spine and I arched against him, wanting to be as close as possible.

I couldn't believe it either. Only moments earlier I'd been angrier than I ever have been with him. Sure we've had our occasional spats, but those are quickly mended with a funny e-mail or a bag of chips as a peace offering. Something about tonight was different. For one, this had nothing to do with work. That afternoon I returned home to find a message from Jim, declining the invitation to my wedding next month with the lame excuse that he would be "out of town." I knew this was a lie. When Jim lied, his voice cracked and he stuttered, filling in the gaps with lots of nervous "ums" and "uhhs." Besides, nobody schedules a vacation the same day as a friend's wedding on accident. So why didn't he want to go? I admit, things have been a little rocky between us lately. From the internship issue to his not-so-subtle dislike of my fiancé, our relationship is definitely not what it used to be. Nevertheless, he is still my best friend and I need him there on the most important day of my life.

Unable to confront him on the phone, I stormed over to his house. He didn't seem surprised to see me and stepped out of the way when I stomped in. At first, he just stood there silently and let me vent my frustrations on him. I could have gone on for hours--all of the hurt I'd felt over the last few weeks had finally boiled over. When I paused to catch my breath, he stepped forward.

"I can't go to your wedding, Pam," he said firmly. "I'm sorry, but I just can't." I felt a pang in my heart as I noticed how defeated he looked. He eyes were rimmed with dark circles and his shoulders slumped. Instinctively I shuffled forward and brushed his forearm with my fingertips.

We stared at each other for a tense moment. "Why?" I finally managed weakly. He was now standing very, very close and I was very aware of how dark his warm brown eyes had become.

He took a deep breath and suddenly his lips were on mine and he was kissing me, hard. His breath on my face, my neck. Pressing against me with his palm on the base of my spine and my back against the wall holding me steady. I could feel his arousal against my hip and I couldn't believe that I could cause that kind of reaction in him. Anticipation and need hummed through my limbs as the room spun around us.

I was desperately kissing him back. I had to stand on my toes to reach--he's so tall. He was warm and it felt so right that I wanted to cry. His lips momentarily left mine to kiss away the single tear trailing down my cheek.

I whimpered and he pulled back slightly, his eyes questioning. I couldn't stand the sudden aloneness and closed the gap once more, this time reaching around to remove his tie. He got the hint and gently slipped my cardigan off my shoulders while my fingers went to work on unbuttoning his work shirt.

Together we fell onto the couch, knocking a lamp over on the way down. The abrupt darkness made us both bolder as our kissing became frantic and our breathing more ragged. His hand was sliding up my stomach and my nails were gripping his now bare lower back. I surprised myself by subconsciously admiring Jim's firm body and comparing it to Roy's doughy one. Not that I didn't find Roy attractive, I just…

_Oh God. Roy._

"Jim, we have to stop," I said, reluctantly bringing to a halt that wonderful thing he was doing to my neck. He looked hurt for a moment, but the confusion in his eyes faded as he realized what I meant. I groped around until I found a light switch. In the harsh light I suddenly felt like we were two awkward teenagers trying to learn the ropes. My skirt and blouse were half off, and Jim was only in his pants. Jim obviously felt the same way, and he shot me a brief apologetic smile he sat up. We were both quiet for a moment as we absorbed the reality of what had just happened.

"I'm sorry Pam," I heard him say, more to his feet than to me. "I was out of line."

I knew then that we could go back to how we were. We could both apologize and forget this ever happened. We could go back to being Jim and Pam, office buddies. We could go back to lunches together and eye-rolls at Michael and pranks on Dwight. Everything could be just how it was.

Only the thing was, I didn't want it to be.

"No," my voice felt like it didn't belong to me anymore. "I want to be with you, Jim."

He flinched a bit when I said that, and turned to face me. I put my hand on his and continued.

"I need you to be patient. Roy and I have been together for so long. It's going to be really hard to end it and if you don't want to wait, I understand."

Jim looked at me incredulously then broke out in that grin I love so much.

"Believe me, I can wait."

_Fin._

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Ok so...yay or nay? This is my first time writing something like this, and I would definitely like to hear feedback! Thank you in advance.


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